new moon

a song at weicheng

a morning rain has settled in the dust at weicheng;
willows are green again in the tavern dooryard.
wait till we empty one more cup –

west of yang gate there’ll be no old friends.

                      - wang wei
                      calligraphy by master lee hang-wen

*

a hard few days after a hard few days.
trying to remember what i've lost through the filter of what it means i've been given.
but it's hard, and it's strange, and there's something i haven't been able to talk about that i continue to not be able to talk about. my nightmares seem pretty enthusiastic on the matter, but such is the nature of nightmares.

shadow selves and relentless hungers.

astrology is rocky territory and my interpretations of it have always tended toward the avant garde. what i can tell you is: mamas, don't let your babies get born during venus retrogrades. i was born during one and i can tell you, the twenty-six i've lived through? chaos, pathos, tragedy; and/or brooding the night sky to a new understanding of black. if there isn't heartbreak, the retrograde seems to antagonize them into being. if there is already heartbreak, it builds on what is there. it builds civilizations on what is there.

all the same, this is one unbelievably beautiful piece of writing about today's new moon. plugs into every issue i've been working for the last year. or maybe that's: plugs into every issue that's been working me over for the last year. gives me a little hope that maybe something

maybe something.



you know?